Author: admin

Blockbusters! Remember that epic TV game show, hosted by Bob Holness and much loved by students everywhere. The aim of the game was to move across the board by choosing letters and answering quiz questions, whose answer began with that letter. 

Sometimes the next letter was a P, so the grinning contestant would ask ‘Can I have a P please Bob?!’

It was a pretty edgy kind of show!

One P that I like is P for Permission. A permission is a statement that allows us to unlock new thinking, create new behaviours and enable us to become unstuck. We can give them to ourselves, we can share them with friends and family and we can use them at work to support the development of our colleagues.

Here are some of my favourites and you’re welcome to choose which ones speak to you. Feel free to adjust the words and to share them with people in a smiley, kindly way.

It’s ok to get help.

It’s ok to have needs and wants.

It’s ok to make a start and work it out as we go.

It’s ok to not know things and to find out.

It’s ok to stop.

We can be resourceful.

We can find our voice and speak up.

We can know that we are important.

Good enough is good enough.

It’s ok to share feelings with special friends.

It’s ok to ask for what we really need.

It’s ok to take time.

We can choose to make changes.

We can choose to take care of ourselves.

It’s ok to rest.

It’s ok to say not at this time, or not in this way.

It’s ok to be the age we are now.

It’s ok to make a mistake and to learn from it.

It’s ok to smile.

Have fun with permissions and we can create them to suit our situation. You’re welcome to email me and share your permissions too!

Next week: Just Be

I love strokes.

Not the nasty medical ones you understand, I’m referring to the Transactional Analysis ones. A stroke, in TA terms, is a unit of recognition – a smile, a wave, a doughnut (what are donuts eh!?), a ‘well done’, a ‘love you’ …including hugs and kisses.

Now, some of these you can offer people at work and remember to keep within your accepted cultural boundaries…we don’t want to scare anyone with sudden deep fried dough-based treats.

It’s a truism that ‘what you stroke grows’ – if we say nice things to people they tend to warm to us and vice versa. So it’s up to us to decide how much loveliness we want to put into the world. Personally I’d say ‘a lot’ was about the right amount.

Here’s a fun exercise for today. Write a list of 10 people in your life – they can be partners, colleagues, family members and/or friends. Then for each person ask yourself: Over the last two weeks have I given this person more lovely strokes than they are have given me? Or do I owe them a few kind words, or a smile or two?

If you owe them a stroke them make a note of what and when you will do something. If they owe you, then it’s Ok to ask them to make the tea, share their cake, or give you a hug. A hug you ask for is still a hug – try it and you’ll see what I mean.

A rich world is full of loving and thoughtful strokes of recognition and if there is someone who you know you tend to ignore, maybe change your ways and find time to include them. They do know you’re ignoring them, they will have an awareness of it.

So, how did you do with your list? Who is going to be getting an extra big ‘thank you’ this week?

Oh and finally…remember to stroke yourself…have fun!

Next week: I’ll Have a P Please Bob