Author: admin

If you know boats you’ll know the title should be stern mooring. If you don’t know boats, like me, then parking is good enough. In essence stern parking is like trying to reverse neatly into a space at the supermarket …in the snow.

You have no real control over the boat if the wind takes the bow and it’s super scary in a tight space, with plenty of other boats to bump into. Oh, I should mention that I have a boat. 

Boats are fun and being on the water is like visiting a secret world that can only be accessed if you’re able to float. A gentle cruise on a sunny day is rather a lovely way to spend a weekend …right up to the point when you have to park it once you’re back at your home berth.

The trick to parking is to take it slow and steady. Allow yourself to stop dead in the water and see what the wind is doing and make gentle slow turns. Don’t be afraid to bump into something (fenders are there to be used) and have a friend with you to sort the ropes and provide encouragement. 

It’s a good metaphor for business …slow and steady wins the day and we all take a few knocks along the way. However, we have to learn from these and make little changes so that our performance keeps on improving.

It’s also tough be totally on our own in business and so we can find a friend to support us.

My biggest lesson in terms of boat parking, or business management, is that encouragement from a trusted ally really helps to nurture us and build our confidence. 

So this week think about …who is your bigggest supporter and when will you be chatting to them next? What words of encouragement would you like to hear from them?

Business and parking is rarely easy, or straightforward, but we can manage to do both if we make sure we have the right support.

Happy stern parking!

Next week: Sales Pacing

When young children are at school their teachers tend to work hard to make them feel safe and secure. School can be a big scary place when you’re little and so it’s natural for the big people to take good care of the little people.

Of course as these young children grow older they are encouraged to be independent and resilient. Important exams come and go and the little children turn into big young adults and have to make their way in the world, perhaps at university, or at work. 

At what point do they stop asking for help I wonder? When do they learn that ‘help’ implies weakness in some way?

I ask this because I’ve worked with many adults in organisations who find asking for help too difficult, until they reach a point of extreme stress and a coach, maybe me, is hired to support them.

As we grow up into adults our younger selves remain inside us. In Transactional Analysis terms we describe this as the Child Ego State. When we are said to be ‘in our Child’ we might be playful or rebellious, creative or socially responsible. Our Child is the little us who was and who now sparks useful or desctructive behaviours in us as adults.

What is interesting to me is that little us did learn to ask for help at one point in our lives and that this helpful trait can be forgotten.

As adults we all have the capacity to ask for help, or support, or comfort, and yet often we don’t do this. I wonder that our journey towards independence has covered over this ability, or perhaps one day we did ask and were rejected and made a decision never to ask again. 

I have news!

The past isn’t the present. Not earth shattering news I will admit, but true none the less. Asking for help is the sign of a grounded, thoughtful, responsive grown up.

Seeking support is strength.

It enables those around us to do the same, because our efforts give them permission to find their voice when needed.

Recently we had a busy week at home and I asked the children to help out round the house, instead of me being super-dad and sorting everything. Not only did we share the workload, but the kids enjoyed it and liked the sense of responsibility and I was happy to pay them in chocolate eclairs. I do a very good rate of eclair per hour!

Joking aside, what I learned for myself was that asking for help can start in small easy ways. I will ask again in the future and keep up the momentum from solo work to team work. 

Who could you ask for help this week? What would be one small task, or one thorny problem that would be helpful to be supported with?

The child inside can relearn the lessons of the past in order to support the person we are today. 

Have fun!

Next week: Stern Parking For Beginners