Richard Maun

Tag: tip

  • Job Hunting Tips #1 …Be Specific

    To Richard... from one scrummy writer to another....
    To Richard… from one scrummy writer to another….

    Did I mention that I met Stephen Fry last week? He came to Holt to let me buy a copy of his latest book and of course I couldn’t resist popping by for a quick chat. I even let him sign it for me, as I know what a buzz that gives writers.

    And after he had signed it I handed him one of my new Twitter cards (see last week’s post) and asked if he’d be kind enough to pass it on to Mrs Stephen Fry, as her tweets are very droll. He laughed and said ‘Oh my goodness, yes I will’ in that voice of his that could have been agreeing to try out a particularly fiendish piece of grammatical tonguery, or just polish off a slice of rampantly creamy victoria sponge…

    …And breathe out. See; I went all Stephen Fry there for a minute….

    Anyway, as I was saying, the point was I gave him a card and asked for something. An hour later (I assume he had rushed home specifically) he had tweeted out my request to @MrsStephenFry and in addition @PippinFry was now following me, as were about a dozen new people.

    Much fun was had by all as we talked about getting a royal mention, but the point of it all was this:

    When you’re networking it pays to ask for something specific.

    People are more likely to remember it and act on it than if you’re just asking for something vague. People remember specific details and not generalisations, so don’t ask people if they ‘know someone who could help me’ …instead ask them (in my case) if they ‘know anyone who would be interested in becoming an ILM Accredited Level 5 Coach?’

    I would have asked Stephen (we’re on first name terms now), but I assume he’s already qualified, so went for the Twitter option instead.

    The vast majority of my recruitment colleagues agree that 75% of all new roles are filled through networking, which is bad news if you’re just hunting on websites and in the sits vac section of your local paper. However, to be successful at networking you have to ask for something specific. So, please ponder this question, which could make a crucial difference to you:

    Q: Who are you meeting this week: What precisely will you be asking them for?

    Here are some typical answers to that question to mull over:

    A) Who do you know who is looking for a business manager?

    B) This has been a useful meeting and could I be cheeky and ask for the names of 5 people who you think would be good to talk to?

    C) Thanks for your time and I’m interested in offering people a free two-day consultancy project, whilst I look for work. Who do you know who might be interested?

    Which one of the above might work best for you? I had planned my Stephen Fry request in advance and I had practiced my words a couple of times too, to be sure I captured the moment confidently. He was fun to meet and if he’s signing a book near you please pop in and say ‘hi’ from me…

     

    More Job Hunting Tips!

    If you’re new to this blog there are three great books listed on the homepage and you’re welcome to browse. One of them is one of the best practical guides to job hunting around. I know, because I wrote it, based on direct feedback from candidates and observation about what makes for success in the current market place. In addition, if you’d like to know how to write a book, do contact me and line up your questions. Or, if you’d like me be a speaker for your group or event then you can have that as well. I’ve been told that I’m good at it too. What would you like? Networking? Leadership? Running a business? Or to tap into the world of Transactional Analysis?

    Pass It On

    If you know someone who would be interested in this blog post please forward it to them, or ReTweet it, or let them know they can subscribe to regular emails via the box on the homepage.

    Next Week

    We’ll be looking at one of the most common errors people make on their CV. I’ll bet it’s not what you’re thinking!

  • Four Ways That Two Ego States Interact

    One way to play with cards! What does your Parent say though?
    One way to play with cards! What does your Parent say though?

    There are many ways that we can interact with eachother and now that school’s out for the summer there will be many families who witness more whinging, sulking and general grousing. And that’s just from mum and dad….

    …you can almost smell the Child Ego State at work here and when we think about being in our Parent or our Child there are four typical ways people tend to communicate. Of course there are always nuances of behaviour and complex conversations, so all we’re doing here is taking a fat brush to conversations and painting them in four big stripes.

    1) Parent to Parent
    Arguing over who’s in charge, or who really knows best…you see this in the school playground when two mums tell eachother how they would run the school. Also, this is often seen when two managers at work are talking at (not to) each other to establish who is top dog.

    2) Parent to Child
    Telling someone what to do and expecting them to be a good boy/girl and get on with it. This is sometimes disguised as ‘asking’ and can still be telling…this is what my Child tends to rebel against, when it has flounced off in a huff, to sulk for a bit. Telling and asking can also be friendly and supportive, so we don’t want to think of things as just being negative. Likewise, when we’re taking care of our team, or partner, it’s likely that our Parent is addressing their Child.

    3) Child to Parent
    If we’re unsure, nervous, unwell, or need someone to guide us it’s quite likely that in our Child we will hook the other person’s Parent, so that they take the leadership position and sort things out for us. I’ve seen an unhealthy example in an office recently, where an Assistant kept using her ‘lost and confused’ look to snag a Manager into doing the work for her. Sometimes our need to be looked after is genuine and healthy and sometimes we might simply be avoiding taking responsibility ourselves.

    4) Child to Child
    Ever played with your partner (you can define ‘play’), or had a joke at work? Of course you have and these are classic interactions where our natural Child energy is there for all to see. Being creative, solving problems with intuition, having fun, or perhaps crying together, are all examples of when we’re all in our Child Ego State. Watch out though after a hard day at work, when both of you are in your Child and looking for someone to be the Parent and do the looking after…’No, you cook dinner!’…’NO! It’s your turn to do dinner!!’ …sound familiar?

    Once we can see what is happening we can make decisions to continue or to change. Do we keep playing, or do we cook dinner, or take the lead, or ask for help? We can enjoy noticing how well we communicate with others and can stop and do things differently if we feel things spiralling into an argument.

    When we’re tired or stressed it’s likely that we will be in either our Parent or our Child and so given the nature or looking after the kids for six weeks, or going ‘on holiday to relax’ many of us will have ample opportunity to spot patterns of Ego State behaviour over the summer. The trick here is to be honest and to ask for what we need from those around us. Even if that means asking the kids to prepare dinner once in a while!*

    Our Task For This Week

    Is to…have fun noticing Ego States. Perhaps watch EastEnders….who is in their Parent and who is in their Child?

    Amazon Review

    Job Hunting 3.0 has had it’s first review (thank you) and if you have read the book please do add your review to Amazon as they make a difference. Just click here – thank you!

    Pass It On

    If you know someone who would be interested in this blog post please forward it to them, or ReTweet it, or let them know they can subscribe to regular emails via the box on the homepage.

    Thank you for reading to the end…

    Next week is about the Adult Ego State and part two of ‘Icecream Story’…

     

    *Assuming you’re not expecting a five year old to rustle up anything too fancy!