This isn't a cup of tea... it's a conversation starter!

A client asked me how to start a conversation and it reminded me that it’s often easier to talk about networking than it is to go and do it. Starting conversations is easy, when you have prepared a couple of opening gambits. These can include:

A) You smile, profer your hand for a fellow networker to shake and introduce yourself. You can then ask them: Have you had a busy day? (Or do you have a busy day to look forward to?). These are closed questions and you can bet they’ll be answered with a ‘Yes’. Then you can follow up with an ‘open’ conversation starter such as: And what does a busy day look like for you?

B) Recognise that people like to begin a conversation with safe ‘Rituals’ such as organising drinks and asking how you are? Answer: Fine. (This is safe and predictable… if you want to scramble their brain then firmly clasp their arm and thank them for their concern, before talking wildly about your troubles). After a Ritual introduction people are happy to do some ‘Pastiming’. This is where we chat about safe subjects, such as the weather, the journey to the meeting, if they watched a popular TV programme and so on. Pastiming requires more thought than Ritual and there’s more risk involved (perhaps in disclosing you watch the Antiques Roadshow) and with a few easy questions you can soon find yourself in the flow of a productive conversation.

Ritual and Pastiming are two TA terms that relate to Time Structuring… which is a model that helps us to work out where we are in a conversation. It’s only once we’ve made a friend or built some rapport that we can move up to ‘Activity’ and get down to business.

And a tip that I often offer is simply to learn five good questions that are easy for people to answer. If you’re stressed then it’s simpler to just use rote learning to get a conversation started, rather than having the burden of thinking in the moment! Suggestions include:

1) How long have you done that?

2) How did you get started?

3) What trends are there in your industry?

4) What mistakes do people tend to make when they start out?

5) What do you look for in a client?

Preparation is the key and it’s okay to rehearse your questions on the journey, to make sure you have them up and running in your head. That’s what I do!

And remember… people like to be listened to, so if you’re doing more nodding and less talking, the other person will feel like it’s a really great conversation.

Happy chatting!

There are lots more tips to improve our people skills in the book How To Keep Your Job. Have you read it yet?

You don't need batteries to find your voice!

Sometimes life or work can spring a surprise on us and for a moment we waver and wonder what to do.

In that long moment of hesitation all sorts of things rush through our head. Fear, worries, uncertainty about the future, what should we do next?

And life is all about ‘moments and turning points’ …an elegant phrase that I wish was mine, but belongs to Alan Robertson, a Cranfield colleague and all-round good chap.

In these tiny bubbles of time we have to think on our feet and remind ourselves that:

1) We’re OK! We are good, worthwhile people at heart.

2) We have a right to be here and a right to decide for ourselves what to do.

3) We have a voice and can use it. We can pause and think and then we can speak and be heard – we can find our voice.

Last week a friend of mine found her voice and resigned her job, to begin a new life as a consultant.

Last week my colleague found his voice and asked for some help to choose between two exciting job opportunities.

Last week a client practised his presentation skills and his voice moved from monotony to fluidity. He found his selling voice and secured a new job.

Sometimes we want to say things to people, to be heard, to share our feelings and our voice catches in the back of our throat. When this happens, take a deep breath, remember that you’re a worthwhile person and speak out loudly and clearly. Maybe:

…Ask for what you need.
…Share your thoughts.
…Say ‘no thanks’ or ‘not yet’.
…Tell someone how you feel.
…Take that decision.

And enjoy the moment as you find your voice.

When will you be finding your voice this week?

Keep going... to get a gold medal and a job!

All it requires is for you to be persistent, have faith (that you will succeed) and get some quality support. Too many people rely on luck and this week I was reminded about the difference support can make.

A client of mine called Paul secured a new job. Big hooray for Paul… he’s a star performer and proves the case that there is a job out there if you really want it.

Paul made sure he was targeting jobs that matched his CV, he worked hard preparing for interviews and he always asked for feedback. He was also big enough to accept the feedback and act on it, which was a crucial step to being successful.

After one particular interview he was given a piece of feedback that didn’t make sense so he called me and we worked through it and it turned out that a worry ‘out of his awareness’ was creeping in to affect his language and posture.

Although the effect was subtle the outcome for the interviewer was to feel uncomfortable…and of course Paul then didn’t get the job.

We contracted for coaching time and used Skype to ‘meet up’ …and after a few sessions had nailed the problem (using some nifty insights from Transactional Analysis) and in consequence Paul’s interview performance soared.

Is there a ‘moral’ here?

Well, I’m always amazed by people who trust to luck to get a job. In my view they’re just kidding themselves and causing undue stress to their family. (Many don’t really want a job and prefer to stay stuck).

I’m also sure that there’s a job out there for us all… if we can be bothered to work hard enough to get it.

Paul has been chasing work for several months and his success didn’t some quickly – but it did come.

And it came because he was able to accept feedback and work with a professional coach to help fine tune his performance.

What I learned was that Skype is an excellent way to get coaching support and so it doesn’t matter where you are in the world… you can get ahead with a coach.

If you really want a job or have a problem that needs solving I’m now only a mouse click away. And I like that… as it’s a very cost effective, time efficient way to support people.

Minds, like doors, need to be kept open at all times

…Maintain an open mind. Last week I was chatting to a person who said he was ‘out of work’. This is quite a passive statement and helps to reinforce negative feelings, so I was not surprised that he said it with an Eeyore sigh.

Much better to be ‘looking for work’ or ‘looking forward to my next job’ as these forward looking phrases help us to remain more upbeat.

As I met the person before going on air at a local radio station I had both Job Hunting 3.0 and How To Keep Your Job in my hand and I happily showed him the books. His response was, without opening either of them:

‘Hmmm….these books are all rubbish.’

(Actually he said a ruder word, which rhymes with rap).

‘Well now,’ I replied with a smile, ‘the world is full of books and perhaps some of them might rhyme with rap. But not all of them. For example, these two are based on real life coaching conversations and feedback about what really works and what doesn’t. You don’t have to choose to read them, but if the next person does, then you’re going to be disadvantaged.’

He mumbled something along the lines of ‘I see your point’ and grudgingly gave them a closer inspection.

If you’re looking for a job then keep an open mind and judge things on their merits and not on preconceived ideas or simple nervousness.

Books are a force for good, as is coaching, or getting support from your friends. I’m always amazed that people hoping to earn £200,000+ over the next 5 years spend zero on their own success and leave things to chance. And I’m saddened when people prefer to say ‘no’ to new opportunities and new learning, in order to stay stuck.

So, if you catch yourself making poorly judged sweeping statements, stop and think. Think about what you can do and who you’re gonna call?

Ghostbusters!

….But don’t call them unless you’ve just been slimed. Amazon, a coach, or a well informed friend is a much better bet.

Thoroughly check your briefs... or risk failure!

…Then answer the brief. Being successful in job hunting (and other sales processes) relies on many things and yet the simplest elements still elude even the brightest candidates.

When you’re invited to pitch yourself and have 10 minutes to deliver a presentation you must answer the brief that’s been set. For example, if you’re asked to tell the panel about:

1) Your key skills?
2) How you fit the job?
3) How you communicate effectively?
4) How you develop yourself?
5) The tangible value you bring to the organisation?

They don’t want you to tell them about:

A) Your time as a Cub Scout…*
B) Your favourite fishing spot…
C) A long list of TLA’s you know…**
D) Your views on how they could manage their business better…
E) A management book you recently browsed a) in the airport or b) on your smart phone whilst waiting to be interviewed…

And yet people persist in making elementary mistakes. They often don’t read the brief twice, or they get carried away with cramming in all 100 ‘key abilities’. Sometimes they decide to stand out by ‘being different’ or by ‘being creative’. And they succeed… they stand out as the candidate who can’t be scored properly because they haven’t answered any of the set questions, which have been asked for specific reasons.

Nul points for you, if you patronise the interview panel by making it clear their pathetic brief can be ignored because you know what they’re really looking for!

So, when you’re answering an advert, preparing a presentation, practising interview skills, or simply selling products and services to people ask yourself:

Have I really answered their questions or am I simply ‘on send’ and just talking at them?

In my experience 80% of people rely on luck and in doing so open their mouth and cram in a large brogue. Then they wonder why they didn’t get the job/promotion/business.

But you’re smart: you’ll make sure you answer the brief… won’t you?

* This has happened, sadly.

**TLA means ‘Three Letter Acronym’, such as JIT, OEE, ATB, NFN:

Just in Time
Operating Equipment Effectiveness
Answer the Brief
Normal for Norfolk

Practise hard to make sure you hit all the right notes on the day!

I thought I’d pose this question because last week I was working with a client the day before she had a job interview.

When I asked if she’d like some time to practise her interview answers together she laughed and said ‘no, that wouldn’t be necessary.’

…Apparently she was a confident interview candidate and had taken part in many ‘good’ first and second interviews before.

This was worrying.

Worrying, because if someone thinks they’re okay when they’ve had lots of interviews, they’re missing the point: They’re supposed to get a job.

Having lots of interviews can mean that they have a great CV, but tend to under-perform in some way when put under pressure. People shelter under the notion that lots of interviews must mean they’re doing something right. Wrong. It’s a warning signal that they’re stumbling somewhere and need help to find out why.

I chatted all this through with the client and she laughed again, in a hollow kind of way, that suggested I was right. We did a little demo interview and sadly I was. However, after a sharp 30 minutes of practise-review-practise-review she was much improved and could now:

1) Keep her answers to about 60 seconds. Any longer and it’s called ‘waffle’.

2) Include numbers in her answers. Numbers tell the story for you and show the scope and scale of the good work you have completed.

3) Answer the question. A common question for a manager to be asked is: ‘When have you overcome resistance?’ A snappy answer using the STAR technique is a great way to impress, so learn to anticipate common questions and rehearse your answers, because it will help to reduce the pressure you’re under and to increase your ability to clinch a job.

With the STAR approach all you do is STate the issue, talk about the Actions you took (I, not We here)* and finally outline the positive Results for you and the organisation.

So, going back to the question in the title, the answer is, of course: Never.

It’s a trick question really, as there is never an interview, speech, presentation, debate or sales pitch that isn’t improved by a bit of practise.

So, as you look ahead to your work over the next two weeks… What do you need to practise for?

Go for it!

*Talk about ‘what I did was…’ because they’re not interviewing the team. They’re just interviewing you. Hiding behind ‘what we did was…’ looks woolly and your contribution is hard to spot.

Technology and cans (and coffee)

My glasses have been misbehaving. Not playing violent 18-rated games on XBox (which they’re too young for) or staying out late without telling me when they’d be home. No. Something much worse.

They’ve been slipping down my nose.

I know. Scandalous isn’t it.

When they gently descend and force me to peer out over the top of the rims I look like a patronising professor. I then have to push them back up, knowing they will soon defeat me once more. And you thought you had a tough life!

So to tell them who’s boss I popped into my local optician and had them sorted. They were given a stern talking to, made to sit in the naughty-glasses-case for five minutes and finally heated up and had their arms gently adjusted. They’re now a reformed character and back to doing their job properly.

During the course of their rehabilitation I learned that the optician’s daughter was currently writing a dissertation about Twitter. Amazing! Something that hardly existed two years ago is now a serious topic for academic research. She was writing about it’s usefulness as a marketing tool for publishing and ebook sales. Twitter has certainly helped me to sell books and it reminded me that if we want to be successful at selling products and services we need to attack all the routes to market.

It costs nothing to explore Twitter, other than some time and maybe a bit of nervous energy, as we wonder if people will want to follow us. Follow me at @RichardMaun and I’ll follow you back, all for free.

In my world of books it’s important to use tools like Twitter and YouTube to find customers and make them aware of my products. Thanks to the work of the actor known as Brian we’ve managed to generate more interest and more sales with the two short films he’s already starred in.

Continuing the theme from last week’s post, about what I did well in 2011, the discussion with the optician reminded me that new technology is here to stay and that I continued to do a good job of using it this year. Looking back over 2010 I gained over 1,000 newfollowers on Twitter, posted 2 videos on YouTube, set up a FaceBook fanpage for Job Hunting 3.0, developed the blogsite and posted each week and, perhaps the smartest thing; integrated it all with my much loved Blackberry. (Apologies to iPhones everywhere).

So when you look back on your success in 2011, which bits of technology did you use really well? Instead of dismissing it as ‘not for my business’ how did you make it work for you?

Remember; if we think we can’t…then we can’t. If we think we can…then we can.

Using technology for the good of our business, or our life, is about simply changing the can’t in our head to a can and then having a go. Technology is there to be used, whatever products or services your business provides. And I’m calling it technology because that is what it is; social media is just a current buzz-word for some of the content, but you still need a computer, smart phone, broadband connection and html coded website to link it all up and make it work.

And if my glasses misbehave again, technology will provide a solution. I’m going to have bionic eyes installed.

Ignore what's on the sofa... It's what's down the back that really matters.

Are you looking for a job? Or working as a coach? Or about to agree with your partner what you will be doing over Christmas? (Too in-law, or not to in-law, as Hamlet famously said)…

Clear contracting can help us in all of these diverse situations and by a ‘contract’ I’m referring to a mutual agreement. Transactional Analysis, a subject close to my heart, is often described as a ‘contracted psychotherapy’ and puts clear contracting the heart of the client-consultant relationship. It has much to say on the subject and what follows is based on the work of Berne, Hay and English.

When we’re offered a job we need to agree expectations and terms, if we’re coaching someone we shouldn’t be working if there’s no contract and if we don’t sit down and talk things through with our partner then Christmas can be a disaster.

So, I have 5 Top Tips to offer this week, which we can all use to make sure we have really robust contracts with people. Here they are:

1) Name your frustrations, concerns, likes, or dislikes. Doing this gives people permission to name theirs. We all have them, so we may as well get them on the table, where we can see them, poke them and include them in our thinking. These are the ‘fish’ in the title and we will come back to them later on.

2) Think about the issue of competency. Are you competent do the work? Is the other person competent to take part? I recently had pass an opportunity on to a colleague because a client wanted me to run a workshop that I wasn’t fully competent to do. What was the point in doing 60% of a job, when my colleague could work to 100% of the client’s needs?

3) Talk about contracting. It’s a word that needs to be in our everyday language. We use the word a good deal at home; not to be smug, but because we lead busy lives and need to agree diaries, kids pick-up times, food requirements and so on. It saves a lot of heartache and grumpiness later, so why not make it part of your lexicon?

4) The success of the contract is determined at the psychological level. This is a posh way of saying that if you agree to something that you really don’t want to do then you’ll probably either not do it, or will make such a fuss that a row breaks out and the work fails. The first top tip says ‘name your frustrations’ because of this. If you talk about what’s inside you can deal with it and I’d rather have a harder talk now and a better Christmas, than the other way round…

5) Check understanding. I think a lack of clear understanding causes more rows than anything else. For example, a chum told me that last Christmas she invited her sister over for lunch, to arrive ‘around 2 o’clock’. The sister rolled up at a whisker before 3, without bothering to telephone ahead to let them know where she was. Was she late? Should she have called? Well, all roads lead back to the contract and the need to make sure people are clear. Who do you need to check things with to make sure you’re both clear for your Christmas dinner?

Lots of people think that ‘contracting’ is all about discussing and agreeing the obvious things, such as time/date/place, but the really smart people do this and go the extra distance to talk about their fears, or worries, or limitations in order to add them into the mix.

I call these things ‘stinking fish’ because they’re like having a kipper down the back of the sofa. You know it’s there. You can smell it. You might ignore it, but the smell persists…The only thing you can do is to reach for it, pull it out and deal with it.

So, what do you have to deal with this week, in order to achieve a really good contract with someone? Who do you need to sit down with to re-visit an existing agreement? What fish lurk down the back of your psychic-sofa?

We all have fish, so smile, pluck them out and talk about them. That’s the real secret of successful contracting.

Oh Yes, That Promo Video…have you seen it yet?

Los Penguin Productions have posted the  Job Hunting Blues video on YouTube so please click through and enjoy it. It features Brian, our resident stunt man and he was great to work with, a real pro. Do you like his boots? And he was very happy to be able to read his own special, little copy of the book Job Hunting 3.0. If you know someone who is looking for work then please point them at Amazon where they can read reviews and order a copy of the big book.

This week: Would you find a friend for me please?

If you know someone who would be interested in this blog post please forward it to them, or ReTweet it, or let them know they can subscribe to regular emails via the box on the homepage. Many thanks.

Next Week

…we will consider one thing that can really smooth the process of contracting. I like doing it…

Brian does something to improve his chances of finding a job

There are currently 2,470,000 people registered as unemployed in the UK, which is split roughly 1.46 million men and 1.01 women. I mention this because losing your job can feel like you’ve been cast into a snake pit, where your chances of getting out again seem slim and uncertain.

In my experience, people looking for work seem to think they are in competition with all the 2,469,999 people who are also out of work. They tell me that it’s impossible to get a job in a recession (it isn’t). That there aren’t any jobs out there (there are). That nobody wants to hire them (this isn’t true). And so on…

People give away their power by using negative words and scary statistics to frighten themselves into inaction. A classic example of this is when people say:

‘I’ve been made redundant.’

Of course the truth is that they haven’t. The job has been made redundant. They remain a useful and talented person, who is looking for work.

This post has the title ‘Do Something’ for two reasons. Firstly, if you change your language you retain your power and can set yourself up for energetic and productive job hunting.

Secondly, and this for me is the BIG one, do something to cut down the odds against you. I’ve noticed in job hunting workshops about 40% of people own a useful job hunting book. If you buy a book and read it you’re now ahead of the 60% of people who know nothing and don’t invest in their own future.

And I’ve come to realise that about 30% of people bother to properly prepare for an interview. By ‘properly prepare’ I mean rehearse their Minute To Win It, practise their STAR answers, know which questions to ask at the end of an interview and are aware of how to use attending skills to maintain contact with people.

If you are one of six people waiting in turn for an interview, the chances are that only two of you will have prepared well enough. Would you like to be one of them?

And finally, it’s true that networking is the smart way to find a job. How many job hunters make a concerted effort to go networking? About 10%. This means that if you go networking then you’ve left behind 90% of the unemployed herd and are competing with a much smaller pool of people. By the time you think about how many people with your skill set are actively networking, you might only be in competition with a few tens of people.

So, if you really want to get a job please do something to increase your chances; buy a book (any relevant book), go networking and really prepare for your next interview.

That way you know you won’t be competing with 2,469,999 other job hunters. You might just be competing with less than 100.

Do something. Increase your odds in your favour. Do it today.

**NEW** Video

Here’s fun. My chums at Los Penguin Productions have posted a new Job Hunting Blues video on YouTube and you’re welcome to have a look. It features Brian, our resident job hunting stunt man. He was great to work with, a real pro.

More Opportunities To Do Something

The Minute To Win It, the STAR answers and much more useflness can all be found in the book Job Hunting 3.0. If you know someone who is looking for work then please point them at Amazon.

Pass It On

If you know someone who would be interested in this blog post please forward it to them, or ReTweet it, or let them know they can subscribe to regular emails via the box on the homepage. Many thanks.

Next Week

We’ll be looking at attending skills. How well do you engage with people?

A Mystery: The Case of the Disappearing Walnut Whips

In the box on my lap I had six walnut whips and now I have just two left. I blame the rain really, as there’s only one thing to do when it’s all soggy outside; eat chocolate.

Now up until this point you might be thinking that I have scoffed four walnut whips, and I may well have. I’ll tell you later.

However, the key point here is that the story becomes more interesting when we have some numbers to give us a sense of scale or scope.

It’s the same for CVs and cover letters as well. Adding numbers to our achievements serves three important functions:

1) Numbers make them memorable. It’s easier to remember ‘a box of 6 walnut whips’ than ‘some walnut whips’. We tend to remember specific details more easily than vague descriptions.

2) Numbers reveal the size of our achievements. This gives people a real sense of how we could add value to their business. If I could eat four walnut whips at home, I could come and do that in your business too!

3) Numbers make things interesting. Plenty of CVs are dull, bland, full of clichés and generally lifeless. Stir in some numbers though and we become interesting and our stories gain life and style.

All achievements can be measured in some way and there are no exceptions to this. It might take you some time to think through your own numbers, but it’s worth the investment as that could be the hook that snags your next interview. We can think about:

• Time saved.
• Money earned.
• Targets met.
• Process steps reduced.
• Output increased.
• Quality levels up.
• Complaints down.
• The number of people involved.
• The number of countries visited.

Things can be measured in £s or % or hours or minutes. As a result of your work did the trend line go up or down?

If you’re struggling to measure your achievements it could be because the biggest net effect came from a downstream process. If this is the case it’s ok think about the consequences of your work and to focus on this.

Examples of achievements can look like these handsome bullet points:

• £50,000pa saved in factory overtime as a result of finding capacity increases by using Lean tools, such as single minute exchange of dies (smed).

• 30% increase in the number of sales calls made each week by setting targets for the team and then reviewing progress each Monday.

• 120 people trained in coaching skills, including 8 who went on to pass the senior coaches exam (100% pass rate).

…These are broad examples to show how each achievement becomes an interesting little story when we add numbers. Your challenge is simple; take a fresh look at your CV or your marketing literature (if that’s more relevant to you) and add one number to each key achievement.

Remember: Make numbers even more interesting by multiplying them up over a year. For example, a saving of £2,000 per week isn’t as eye-catching as £100,000 per annum.

Once you’ve finished adding numbers, compare the jazzed up document with the original and ask yourself:

Which version does a better sales job for me?

Oh and the walnut whips? Well, I had one, the twins shared one and the other two were handed out to a couple of chums on Twitter…

More Examples of Achievements

There are more tips and worked examples in the book Job Hunting 3.0, which was described by a journalist recently as ‘a definitive guide to getting a job.’ If know someone who is looking for work then please point them at Amazon.

Pass It On

If you know someone who would be interested in this blog post please forward it to them, or ReTweet it, or let them know they can subscribe to regular emails via the box on the homepage. Many thanks.

Next Week

We’ll be looking at one of the easiest ways to do well in an interview. You’d be amazed at how many people forget to do this one thing.